There’s something to be said for an almost-empty bar. Actually, there’s a lot to be said for it. For me, the benefits begin with being able to belly up, a privilege I enjoy on more than one visit to Dixons Downtown Grill (1610 16th Street). As any barfly will tell…
Sushi Den is one of a handful of restaurants in Denver that never disappoint. I’ve never had a bad waiter, meal or evening there. And I guess most everyone in Denver agrees, because when I went to Sushi Den one recent Saturday night, the place was packed to the gills…
It’s been almost ten years since I last puked. Ten years without a flu vomit, a binge-drinking barf or even so much as a little spit-up. I used to be very proud of this — of the fact that on my 21st birthday, I drank 21 shots in two hours…
What would Britney do? At one time, she was the biggest pop star on the planet; now her name is just another term for vagina (when used in a sentence: “Her skirt was so short, when she bent over I saw her Britney”). One day, in a silent protest of…
No best out of three. No deliberation about what number we’re going to count to before throwing. No time to over-think things. This is drunken Rock Paper Scissors, and the loser has to pee in the sink. But it’s no big deal. In fact, it’s my idea. As fourth in…
Before Colorado’s no-smoking law took effect, I would venture into one of Denver’s classic dive bars knowing full well that after a few hours there, I’d have to go home and disrobe on my back porch so that the stench of stale cigarette smoke wouldn’t seep into the smoke-free sanctuary…
I’m just starting to peel back the label on my third Bud when Terry slides onto the stool next to me at the last great dive on Larimer Street. I’m at Star Bar (2137 Larimer) to watch the Rockies’ post-season tie-breaker game against the Padres; Terry’s here because he works…
Sometimes I ask questions that I already know the answer to — just to make sure the world is spinning correctly on its axis. Why do birds fly south for the winter? Why are bald heads shiny? Why are holier-than-thou conservatives always the ones busted in scandals? So when I…
During my first two years as a Coloradan, I lived in Capitol Hill. Not the Wild Oats or Queen Soopers Capitol Hill; not the Bender’s or Chipotle or Lancer Lounge Capitol Hill; not the Charlie Brown’s or Table 6 Capitol Hill. No, fuckin’ Rent-A-Center, Famous Pizza, Scooter Liquors, Burger King…
College was a very intoxicating time for me, as it was for many people I know, especially my brethren who went to Big Ten universities in small, liberal Midwestern towns like Champaign, Illinois; Ann Arbor, Michigan; and Madison, Wisconsin. But my time in Iowa City was different. When I showed…
There are a few things that I know for sure, and one is that I’m not hip. When I was younger, I thought I was, and/or tried to be, but now I know for sure that I’m not hip, that I’ve never been hip, and that no amount of trying…
This is how utterly shitfaced our bartender is: He’s considerably more drunk than I am, and I’m in 1:30-a.m., slumped-over-the-bar, double-fisting-PBRs kind of shape. But I’m happy, and so is he. I can tell from the way he grins and laughs every time he over-pours one of Darren’s whiskey and…
I have a very simple policy about eating meals while drinking: I don’t. Not, at least, when my goals for the night include over-inebriation. Snacks and appetizers? Fine. But big, juicy bacon cheeseburgers with jalapeño cream cheese and a side of fries? Sweet Christ, never while boozing, and never, ever…
I’m a sucker for fish, which I like watching (tank), catching (fly) and eating (raw). But I don’t eat what I catch, nor do I enjoy seeing fish that I’ll soon be served being taken out of a tank. As with beef — I don’t adopt the cows I’ll later…
The Photo Atlas is already into its second or third song by the time I get to the Marquis Theater (2009 Larimer Street). Adam Lancaster, who runs Morning After Records, the band’s label, meets me out front. We head straight for the bar and order two of the club’s signature…
Ooh la la! When I first moved back to Denver from New York, I spent a lot of time at Bistro Adde Brewster’s, the Cherry Creek hot spot run by Adde Bjorkland and Duey Kratzer, now the proprietor of Mondo Vino. I had too many exceedingly wild nights there and…
We almost take the scooter from my place to Highland. But then Sean has last-minute reservations about riding without a helmet, and regardless of how engaged-to-a-beautiful-girl he is and how comfortable and happy I am with my hetero relationship, there’s still a certain amount of awkwardness when two dudes share…
As I walked toward Sengers on the Fax, a homeless person who’d strategically placed himself near the entrance asked if I could “help out.” After living in New York for years and finally figuring out that “help out” means “give me money for drugs and booze,” I came up with…
I’m pretty well sauced on Guinness by the time Sean and I get to Charlie Brown’s Bar & Grill (980 Grant Street). The eighty-odd-year-old bar tucked into the Colburn Hotel & Apartments — a famed ’40s hangout of Beat hipsters Neal Cassady, Jack Kerouac and Allen Ginsberg — is packed,…
With the exception of especially festive nights, when I do shots, or sushi outings, when sake is just what’s happening, I pretty much drink beer. There are a number of reasons for this, a major one being that I’m lousy at pacing myself. What I mean is, if there’s an…
I hate working out, and I hate people who say how much they love working out. To me, working out is a necessary evil — like taxes, dating and menstrual cycles. So when I heard there was a gym called the Anti-Gym, I got excited: I thought working out there…
It’s almost 9 p.m. when I hear Jesse call my battle name, Drewstroyer, from across the room. Immediately feeling sick to my stomach with first-time anxiety, I set down my second can of Olympia and wade through the crowd of fifty or so competitors and spectators. As I take a…
