It’s horrifying to admit, but the signs are all there: We are growing up. On my birthday, I’d denied the usual urge to overindulge in food and booze simply because it didn’t fit with my diet. JP just put down “earnest money” on a house, meaning that he earnestly wants…
I was in New Orleans a couple of years ago for Jazzfest. On that trip, beer with breakfast was not only acceptable, but encouraged. One day while we were walking, cocktails in hand, along the packed sidewalks of the French Quarter, we happened upon a ragtag band singing in the…
If you’re still not convinced that men and women are totally incompatible, then you haven’t been out in the world for way too long. At least 30 percent of the GNP is dedicated to mitigating the constant conflict. How else to explain Dr. Phil and daytime TV and in general?…
Is Kokopelli a fertility deity — or just a dick? When I stepped inside Kokopelli’s (formerly Manny’s Smokehouse), I instantly loved the look and feel of the place, right down to the wonderful oxblood banquettes and the fabulous blues singer playing on a tiny stage draped with red curtains. But…
If not for all the evidence that I’ve had heterosexual intercourse, I’m pretty sure I could be a priest. As all you Catholics and everyone who makes fun of us know, we’re in the midst of Lent, when we get back to the “Judeo” part of our Judeo-Christian heritage and…
I’ve always loved the drinking aspect of sports. I think that half the reason I took up golf is that it’s officially the only “sport” that has cocktail waitresses (aka cart girls). My second favorite drinking sport is skiing. There’s nothing that compares to that first sip of a cocktail…
I had high hopes for the “Sex and So Much More Show” at the Colorado Convention Center two weeks ago. Since it was billed as a venue for the free exchange of ideas on healthy adult relationships and their sometimes frightening variations, we figured there would be lots of people…
I’m suddenly totally into Brazilians — the country’s cocktails, not the new/old fad of hairless pubic areas. Last week at Rodizio Grill, I discovered the Caipirinha (pronounced kie-purr-REEN-yah, $7.50), consisting of muddled lime, fine sugar and Boca Loca Cachaça, a Brazilian alcohol that’s the third-most-consumed liquor in the world. Made…
I’m considering having the health department launch an investigation into the margaritas at Señor Rita’s (5007 East Colfax Avenue). Recently, all of the Institute of Drinking Studies’ researchers plus several groupies descended on this new bar, which was brought to us by our heroes at the Elm next door, as…
When Jesse Morreale told me he was taking over the old Le Delice space in Cherry Creek and turning it into a restaurant named Sketch, I thought it was a huge stretch. When this spot was Le Delice, it looked like a bad deli — and I couldn’t imagine how…
I grew up in the suburbs south of Denver, where the best restaurant was Mr. Steak — which I loved back then solely for its Texas toast. Today the Texas toast I like best is “Here’s to Texas, living single and drinking double — belly up!” And while I know…
Think Hollywood doesn’t have an agenda? Brokeback Mountain, a more socially acceptable version of Deliverance, is now sweeping awards ceremonies at which celebrities say it’s great that this story is being told, then go out and pick up twenty-something groupies so they can spend the night in front of a…
Remember going to the movies with a big group of friends, smuggling beers in your pockets and then rolling the empty bottles down the aisle during the film — much to the disgust of the “adults” in the audience? As an adult (at least in age), I now generally avoid…
Do you ever get that feeling of impending doom? The one where the bottom drops out of your gut and you hear faint music that makes the Jaws theme sound like a lullaby? It’s the feeling you have when your significant other leaves you a hang-up message at work after…
You’d think that all sorts of things would go with beer — and you’d be right. But even the discerning beer connoisseur who swills Keystone Light recognizes that while a plethora of items and activities complement a brew, there’s still a right and a wrong way to consume the stuff…
Popular, you’re gonna be popular! In Wicked, when the male lead asks, “So — what’s the most swankified place in town?,” good witch Galinda answers, “That would be the Ozdust Ballroom.” If the Broadway show were set in Denver, she definitely would have named Bar Luxe (goofily pronounced bar lukes…
In honor of a visit from someone who will soon fill the post of Italian Representative to the Institute of Drinking Studies — should he actually get hired here in Denver after more than one representative burst into his interview to make drinking plans for the coming weekend — we…
One recent blustery night, suffering from my second cold of the season but feeling like I was coughing up bird feathers and had become the first North American victim of the bird-flu pandemic, I grabbed a few friends to test out this new proverb: “Drink a cold, feed a fever.”…
My New Year’s resolution is to be like U.S. Representative Tom Tancredo, only a little more conservative. I decided this after spending part of the holidays in Summit County with several million people from out-of-state who I doubt had ever sat in chairs, much less been schooled in skiing etiquette…
I believe Spanky’s Roadhouse (1800 East Evans Avenue) chose its name in hopes of generating buzz before patrons even crossed the threshold. Whenever anyone who was born at least twenty years ago hears the word “roadhouse,” he immediately thinks of the cheesy ’80s movie with Patrick Swayze and then almost…
Drink of the week? We were looking for the drink of the season, and it wasn’t going down all that well. Twenty-eight restaurants had signed up for the Denver Convention & Visitors Bureau’s first Mile High Libations contest — that added up to 31 drinks, each bearing a Mile-High friendly…
I recently started working out with a personal trainer named Michael. When I complain that the weights are too heavy, Michael tells me that he confused my weights with those of “Mrs. Peterson, who is eighty years old and just entered assisted living.” When I tell him I think I…
