The Denver County Fair: Where poetry blooms

Poetry is all about words well chosen; success in gardening starts with the right seeds. Placement, or syntax, means everything to both: While the poet needs to know exactly when to let the sun shine directly on a word and when to hide it in shadow, the gardener must likewise…

Gettin’ Crafty: Birthday in a Box!

For all those who give pom-pom critters for birthdays, feel an urge to stick googly eyes on everything or just occasionally get a twitch to fold some origami, we bring you “Gettin’ Crafty,” where we feature a craft you can easily make with minimal supplies and limited finances. For friends…

Comment of the day: The sanctity of marriage

Apparently at a loss for other ways to deal with the scourge of homosexuality, the state of Tennessee resorted to the old Voldemort tactic of not speaking its name last week by banning discussion of it from classrooms — luckily, gay activist George Takei has volunteered his own name in…

Musician visits local haberdashery, purchases hat

The Edge, a musician with the popular band U2, is a man known for the wearing of hats — and while the hat he is primarily known for is his trademark black beanie, we have it on good authority that he also wears other types of hats. Or at least…

Comment of the day: The way I see it it’s very safe sex

Being a phone sex operator is actually kind of boring. At least, that’s the gist of what we learned from Crystal (that’s a pseudonym, by the way), a phone sex operator Thorin Klosowski interviewed back in March for How to Get My Job — there, Crystal tells us that, ultimately,…

The Night of Fire and Thunder will melt your face off

Thank goodness the rain has finally stopped. It was really starting to weigh on our usual summer activities, like texting by the icy waters of our friend’s apartment complex pool and wandering various farmer’s markets looking for raw honey and other stuff white people like. Anyway, the nice weather has…

This weekend: Teller Elementary says, “Hey, let’s put on a show!”

Congress Park’s Teller Elementary School already marches to a different drum when it comes to fundraising: Instead of hosting yet another carnival or bake sale, Teller has Tellerpalooza, for instance: an annual family-friendly night of live music at the Mercury Cafe. And now, local fashion and design maven Tran Wills,…

Comment of the day: Brass olives

When you work at a newspaper, people send you some pretty weird shit — I’ve got one guy, for example, that regularly leaves me hand-written notes and sculptures made out of coat-hanger and papier-mâché. That’s kind of charming, but this email I got today is just bizarre — and while…

Comment of the day: Harold Camping is a horrible Bible teacher

It seems kind of self-evident that Harold Camping is a nut job. For the second time in an otherwise unremarkable career, Camping is currently garnering attention for yet another end-of-days prediction; using a formula of his own design, he claims to have mathematically calculated the date of the apocalypse –…

Comment of the day: Connecting with the energy of the earth

Nothing makes a better target for ironic mockery than sincerity, and when it comes to sincerity, hippies — with their happiness and their frolicking — are a reliable go-to. Whatever you say about them, though, they clearly know how to have a good time; at least, hippie-sympathizing writer Amber Taufen…

Comment of the day: The end times

The end of the world is coming. It’s hard to say when, unless you’re evangelist Harold Camping, in which case you can feel pretty confident in saying that it’s coming… oh, around Saturday. For a few months now, Camping’s been touting his theory that the end times will arrive May…

Top ten penis jokes at Chelsea Handler’s show last night

You think you have a dirty mouth? Surely it doesn’t compare to Chelsea Handler’s, who told the audience all about her early days giving blow jobs as a high-school freshman last night at the Wells Fargo Theatre.Without further ado, Westword is proud to present the top ten penis jokes that…

Comment of the day: Prove it

The original Texas Chainsaw Massacre was one of the most controversial horror movies ever made — so controversial, in fact, that it was banned for many years in several countries. That statement wasn’t really the point of my rant the other day about the upcoming remake of Texas in 3D,…

Move over, Etsy: Regretsy is taking over this crappy internet yard sale

Oh, Etsy.com. You’re like the website version of that overly supportive hippie school where everything everyone creates is great, because art is you and you are art, or whatever.  Luckily for us realists, there’s Regretsy.com, a site that culls only the shittiest handmade stuff from Etsy (and various other crafting…

Browser game of the week: p.i.g.

Last weekend was Ludum Dare 20, a competition that tasks game designers with making a game over the course of the weekend. There were over 300 entries and plenty of those were worth mentioning, but one of our favorites was p.i.g., a curious little game that takes the idea of…

Comment of the day: Don’t judge the hair

Here’s a little blast from the past: On the very first day we launched Show and Tell, we used some pics photographer Aaron Thackeray had snapped of a String Cheese show at Red Rocks and turned them into a post called White People with Dreads: A Field Guide. It didn’t…

Gettin’ Crafty: Mini mortarboards

For all those who give pom-pom critters for birthdays, feel an urge to stick googly eyes on everything or just occasionally get a twitch to fold some origami, we bring you “Gettin’ Crafty,” where we feature a craft you can easily make with minimal supplies and limited finances. For all…

Comment of the day: You forgot one

Last week, America tracked down and killed Osama bin laden, thus proving to everyone that America is the greatest country in the world — and then we inexplicably tossed his body into the ocean, thus assuring that nobody will ever really believe that we really tracked down and killed Osama…